I have had a hard time writing recently. I find inspiration, and am quickly distracted. I am motivated, and use that motivation to do something else. I write a small paragraph and decide it isn’t worth perfecting, elaborating on, or publishing. This keeps happening. Every time I feel that I ‘should’ publish, I force myself away from publishing for some reason. Being unable to write well or publish is frustrating, but the real issue isn’t ability or inspiration. I have plenty of both.
Why not publish? What is keeping me stuck? I have become comfortable once again. Because I am comfortable, I am afraid to publish. I am afraid to put my soul and my musings on paper, let alone out on the internet to represent me. Excuses not to publish come so easily, but the easiest way to defeat them is to turn around the question.
Why publish? This question drives to the heart of what I am doing here. It gives me permission to look inwards. Rather than searching for inspiration or for words, I begin to take a step back and look at my reasoning, my issues, and my goals. Gaining a new perspective of what is going on inside myself was the driving force behind publishing the first essay, and it has become a driving force for much of my life over the past few years.
When I tire of outward inspirations, ample new inspiration can always be found in addressing the reasons for my exhaustion. This realization breaks me out of the rut I’ve been in.
If you need inspiration, look at the reasons, look at the questions. Look at the issue from a new perspective, whether inside or out. If you are stuck in introspection, look outside. If you are searching outside, take a look at the internal reasons: motivation and inspiration are rarely lacking if only you can gain new perspective or ask a new question.